Results.

IT'S been a while since I last let you know what was going on in my life, head and face.

I went to France, ate some ludicrous cheeses and swam a bit. Then I went to London, where I was chillin' in the Express newsroom for a week. Did some articles for the Daily and Sunday Express. Didn't manage to sneak in any subliminal messages of love and liberalism.

I'm currently sitting in my conservatory in my Harry Potter pyjama bottoms, with The Beatles singing Please Mr. Postman. My bitch is making some kind of pasta-pesto disaster in the kitchen.

The reason I give you a brief modern history of my life up to this point is that tomorrow my life is going to change. I'm not getting married, getting shot or getting anybody pregnant, but tomorrow I will be getting my A Level results. It's not quite as seminal as the afore-mentioned experiences, but it is still going to have an impact on life as I know it in the somewhat near future.

I have accepted a place at the University of Sheffield to study Journalism. I like Journalism, and I'm interested in learning it as a discipline. As good old Plato said 'If a man neglects education, he walks lame to the end of his life.' And that doesn't sound too attractive to me.

Tomorrow, when I get my results, I'll have a clearer picture of what to do next year. If things have gone well, I'll be going to Sheffield. If not, I'll be leaving for Mexico as soon as I can get myself a poncho and grow an amusing moustache. After that, who knows.